END OF AN ERA
The water and sanitation department have informed me in my
latest bill that I am being moved to one garbage pickup a week. They have also
listed new rules for what I may dispose of in my magnificent 96 gallon can.
Rules! Can you believe that!
Gone are the days of cheering when the sanitation men toss
the commode from the bathroom remodel into the back of the truck. I have spent
summers playing ‘will they take that away?’ It goes like this: okay they took
the commode but what about the huge vanity and cabinet. Not any more, they now
have new rules. ‘Will they take that away?’ was as summer as baseball or water
skiing.
In the future if I want to get rid of a commode, I will have
to break it into small enough pieces to put it in a garbage bag. They want all
garbage now in a garbage bag, don’t even think about letting your garbage loose
inside the splendid 96 gallon can. Remember the garbage bag commercial where
they were hauling a tire in the bag? Contain it. Keep the can clean. It has a
serial number and can be traced, in case you are contemplating a can adventure.
There might be a more sinister reason for the garbage bagging,
perhaps they are not taking our garbage to the dump. That could be one reason
for these new rules. They might be saving our dump and mailing our garbage
somewhere. This could be the reason for the new rules. Just imagine Fed Exing
the garbage.